I’m Q. Yep, just Q. It’s a short version of the name from a previous blog, and it’s a name I’ve grown rather attached to over the years I’ve blogged about my therapy journey.

Sage Burning became the new home for my blog in March 2019, and I feel the name works in a number of ways. There’s still the burning theme–a method of self-harm I used off and on for years but have (mostly) given up. But there’s also a more hopeful tone to it, since sage burning, or smudging, is a way to clear a space of the residue of a painful past and make space for a happier future. That’s exactly what I’m trying to do in my life and what I’ll be processing in this new version of my blog.

In case you are wondering, I moved my blog because my adult son accidentally discovered the original one. Once I knew he’d been reading it, I didn’t feel free to continue writing all my thoughts and experiences there any longer. If you want, you can trace some of that story backward by starting here.

more about sage burning

Focus of the blog. I started the blog in March 2015, in the midst of a deep and incapacitating depression. It was a long while before I came to realize that it was actually a trauma history that I needed to unpack, and a long while after that before I started to make some peace with my history and most of all, with myself. I write about depression, psychotherapy, medication, horrible withdrawal, upending my career, my first marriage and my divorce, my childhood, my hysterectomy, my experiments with cranio-sacral massage, EMDR, mediation, and other therapies I have thought might help me feel better. And in general, I do feel a lot better these days, though I still have a lot to learn about trust, connection, handling triggers, and hardest of all, sexuality.

Trigger warnings. For me, the whole point of the blog has been to have a place where I could be really honest about my experiences and emotions. I don’t censor myself. In some posts, I describe sexual assaults and abuse, self-harm, suicidal thinking, and emotional abuse. Some of what I write may be triggering to some people, but I don’t put trigger warnings on anything. Or perhaps this paragraph is my trigger warning. I hope, though, that my writing is ultimately a source of encouragement rather than a negative trigger for readers.

Names. As you might imagine, all names have been changed to protect the innocent. And the guilty. And my privacy.

comment–or contact me

Over the past five years, I have been heartened and supported by the comments from thoughtful and compassionate bloggers here on WP. I hope you will comment as well. If you aren’t one for public comments but still feel moved to write, contact me at laquemadasola@gmail.com, and though it might take me a little while, I’ll be sure to reply.